I was pregnant, twice in my 30’s, and all I heard through out both pregnancies is – don’t worry your body will come back. It’s only for a year. Well – it’s been 11 years since my last baby and I am still waiting for that pre baby body to return. Or am I? Pre Baby Body? No Thank You! This post is about my mind shift change on my body after baby.
Pre Baby Body? No Thank You!
I have learned a hard lesson. My physical body is always changing. I was a chunky baby, applauded for rolls on rolls. Then as a child I was way underweight & was told my mother was starving me as I was too thin. Then puberty hit – let’s not go there today. Every day something literally changes with my body. Then at around 16 I’m comfortable in my skin. And I think I am done with the changes. Wow I was wrong. Between 18-24 it’s like puberty all over again. I like to call this phase my growing into my adult body. But I didn’t handle those changes well, in walked an eating disorder. But around age 25 I was settled with what I looked like, I liked what I saw in the mirror & was content. Then I hit 30. there should be a book about this. Some kind of warning signal that at this wonderful age EVERYTHING changes again. I started putting on some weight, i wasn’t as active and boom – I am pregnant.
All through my first pregnancy I was told don’t worry about gaining weight, you will bounce back. You will get your before baby body back. Nourish your baby. Take care of yourself, it’s only for a year. the weight will drop off after. and on and on the lies went. Well, at the time I had no clue they were lies. But the impression was on my brain. So when my 11 pound, 24 inch baby was born – every day I awoke with the anticipation of a child on Christmas to see if my pre-baby body had returned.
Pre Baby Body? No Thank You!
It took me 2 years to lose the baby weight from my first pregnancy. No one told me how hard it would be, I went from a negative double A in bra to a double D and that was a whole new ball of wax for me. But on that journey I couldn’t help by notice the body I had, 2 years post partum was in no way a resemblance of the body I had before baby. But I couldn’t dwell on that too long as I was pregnant again. And for a whole 9 months the same lies were told to me about how easy it would be to get my pre baby body back. So when my baby was born, I was eager to begin the work to get my pre baby body back as I was done having children.
Now many of you know my story of how it took me 7 years post baby to lose the weight. How it was about hormones out of balance and how I corrected it with food. I will save those details for another day if you are new here. But …. I lost 45 pounds and something in me wasn’t right.
See that picture, the one right above. That is me January 2018, I had lost 45 pounds, balanced my hormones, the scale read the same as before pregnancy #1 – but what stared back at me in the mirror WAS NOT the same body I had back in 2006 – before baby. Where was my pre-baby body? Can I get a refund? What went wrong? My stomach used to be flat. I never had rolls. My breasts were perky. My skin wasn’t saggy, WHAT WENT WRONG?
Pre Baby Body? No Thank You!
And this is the lesson I had to learn. My body before baby was gone. That body does not exist anymore. See, my body will always show the proof that it housed 2 babies. I can never have a prebaby body as I have had babies. It was a hard lesson, a hard mind shift change & it took me a while to get it. What I had to come to realize is that I now had a clean slate. A brand new white board to write all over. I now had a day 1 to start a new journey. A new story. And this time I was in charge.
I get to dictate my weight, the size of my thighs, how heavy I can lift, I get to create the image that will stare back at in my mirror. And this will be, it has been, a journey I have loved. I have shared most of my adventure on my Instagram account & you can catch it there.
And… when you are ready to begin your journey – I am only a message away.
So, if you scroll back to the top of this post.. you will see me now, checking out my booty gains. I like my body now, it housed 2 babies, been through a ton and is stronger, leaner & more badass then ever.
Here is my secret. I have been consistently consistent since day 1 of this journey loving myself. I workout 20-45 minutes a day, maybe 4-5 times a week from home, I have a system in place to hold me accountable, I have created a community of like minded women to push me on my hard days & I have learned to eat foods that serve me & not bring guilt & shame.
You are never too old to begin. I am in my late 40’s & I am only just beginning to create a body I will live with through till old age.
Pre-baby body? no thank you! I like my body after baby way better!